The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
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