Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize