Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
No...this little piggys going to the bar
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize