i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
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I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
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I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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