his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize