I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Randomize