You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
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I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
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Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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