Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize