you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize