girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
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I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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