She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Randomize