i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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