please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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