Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize