He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
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