Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
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