How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize