a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize