hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Semen is not good for contacts.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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