I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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