Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Randomize