am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
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A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
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Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
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