He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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