I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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