Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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