How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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