alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize