Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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