he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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