Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
i just had sex bonerless
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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