Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
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