I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
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