So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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