no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
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Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
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I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
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