You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
only if we run a train.
done.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
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I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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