it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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