Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
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