It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize