It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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