Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
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