See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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