His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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