Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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