I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
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