How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize