the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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