how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
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I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
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I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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