i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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