No awkward lesbian experiences without me
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
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