Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
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We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
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He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
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